Farce and fakery: Summing up Trump’s ‘Celebration of America’

President Donald Trump sings the national anthem during a

President Donald Trump sings the national anthem during a "Celebration of America" event at the White House, Tuesday, June 5, 2018, in Washington, in lieu of a Super Bowl celebration for the NFL's Philadelphia Eagles that he canceled. (Evan Vucci/AP Photo)

What a day we just had! Let’s see if I’ve got this right …

A fake president hosted fake Eagles fans (Republican staffers in power clothing with nary an Eagles logo) who watched him fake his way thru the apparently mysterious lyrics of “God Bless America,” lyrics that were written by an immigrant Russian Jew who had not been separated from his family at the border. Two people kneeled in protest; one of them heckled the bone spurs warrior: “Stop hiding behind the armed services and the national anthem!”

Meanwhile, prior to Trump’s stunt, Fox News tried to buttress its Leader and inflame its right-wing fans by airing footage of Eagles players purportedly kneeling — when in truth they were praying. That prompted Eagles tight end  Zach Ertz to tweet at Fox: “This can’t be serious. Praying before games with my teammates, well before the anthem, is being used for your propaganda?! Just sad. I feel like you guys should have to be better than this.”(Fox will never be better than that.)

Meanwhile, inside the White House, flack Sarah Huckabee Sanders said it was OK for bakers to exercise their free speech by refusing to make cakes for gay couples, but not OK for athletes to exercise their free speech by kneeling during the anthem (no Eagle kneeled last season), because her boss says that kneeling disrespects “the men and women of our military.” (The kneelers were protesting police brutality, not the military.)

Meanwhile, over at the State Department, a Trump flack, whose history credentials had apparently been vetted, said that our relationship with Germany is “very strong,” despite Germany’s anger at Trump for slapping steel and aluminum tariffs on the European Union. (Weakening America’s ties to the EU is high on Vladimir Putin’s wish list.) The State Department flack said that our relationship with Germany is very strong because, for instance, “Tomorrow is the anniversary of the D-Day invasion.” (Memo to flack: Please watch “Saving Private Ryan.”)

And meanwhile, Secret Service agents at a White House checkpoint arrested a private contractor for the National Security Council who was reporting for work in the West Wing. Someone in the Trump regime had cleared this guy — even though he was wanted in Maryland on a charge of first-degree attempted murder. He was held in the District as a fugitive from justice, then extradited. (Even if the Leader can’t remember the words to “God Bless America,” his minions should at least be able to vet his employees on a criminal database.)

Making America great again. Or, as I’d call it, Tuesday.

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